Dying to self is the most brutal but beneficial death a person can ever know. When the lights go out on self-will, self-focus, self-worship, and self-reliance, a fire is born inside you that can never be put out. The fire burns more brightly the more we discover any vestiges of self. Like fields of dead grass that are lit aflame, the new growth after death makes that place and makes any person almost indistinguishable.
When a forest is consumed by fire it appears nothing good can come from it. But beneath the surface, something powerful has begun. And when we feel the loss and pain of death to self, remember that a newer, richer, and more full life will push it's way through the ashes.
So let God set fire to the things in your life that are hanging on from the old you. Let anything that needs to die be consumed by God, no matter how familiar it's become to you. Dying to self is really the only way to grow.
John 3, Luke 14:27