Discover Focus

There's no vision for our life that is greater than God's vision. So never settle for aimlessness or even busyness for that matter. Our life can count for something dynamic. Our gifting can be tapped into in ways like we've never imagined. Our legacy can be as rich as our God is great. Our soul can be saturated by a peace that transcends understanding. And all of this can be our new reality, even as we walk through tough personal trials. Yes, our desire to breath, taste, and experience abundant life is even more than the American dream. So we better not settle for anything less than God's best. 

But God's best is often missed by substituting one big problem for another even larger one. Many of us struggle with seasons of aimlessness. Wondering where to focus our life and what to drill down on in life is a common point of discussion. Myriad books are written on finding our sweet spot and staying in it. But without God speaking into the equation we trade aimlessness for busyness. And that's trading down. When lacking clear direction we must resist getting busy. Our greatest need when a sense of aimlessness strikes our soul is to seek the God who gave us our unique design. 

God's plan for aimlessness is not to get a degree in vision. Look at how change really happens.

"Where there is no prophetic vision the people cast off restraint, but blessed is he who keeps the law." 

If we carve out consistent time and in this time pour over the word of God, we WILL receive a joy-filled vision for our lives. There is one other element to put in the mix. Always have a trusted mentor to check your work. Find that person who loves us enough to not be a "yes person" but who will always point us us back to the truth of who God is and who we are in him. 

So trade in aimlessness for the revealed plan God has for your life. Don't get busy. Take the necessary time to dig into the word of God and watch what will happen. The greatest personal discoveries come through self-discovery. 

Proverbs 29:18

Chivalry: Part 8 - First Place

 "...and hold fast to his wife."

Every woman wants to be held. And when a man’s wife senses at the core of her being that we’re holding fast to her, there’s no cap to how rich and intimate the relationship can become. When we put a ring on our bride we make a covenant before God that she is in first place and she'll stay there "until death do us part". This is why marriage is such a weighty decision. The moment we say "I do" there is a shift that must occur in our heart and mind that is consistent with God’s plan and our pleasure. Every other earthly relationship can only compete for second place and beyond. God has established the rightful slot for our bride–first place. 

But our woman needs more than just knowing she's first, she has to feel it. The more deeply a woman feels that her place is secure in your heart, the more she'll flourish. The greatest investment we can make in life is placing deposits in our wife's soul that fill her with unshakable confidence. And the return on this investment is staggering. Every act of love, all the creativity, and every bit of energy we pour into our wife will come flooding back to us in ways we've not even imagined. But a man can’t wait for his woman to move. Real men go first. We need to plant our flag, and be poised to tell anyone who may wonder how much we value our wife, “my bride comes before anything or anyone else on this planet.”

So let’s get real practical. There are at least three big areas in every man’s life that will compete for first place. But our wife must always come before any-one or any-thing. 

Before Our Career - Our wife is the ultimate sounding board and career coach. She may have limited working knowledge of your expertise or skill set, but she knows you better than anyone else knows you. And more than any other person, she has a vested interest in you winning in your work. But no matter how fulfilling work becomes, never let your woman fall from first place, even a close second.

Before Our Kids - Kids are a blessing from God. But the greatest gift we can give them is to never let them take moms place–first place. When we hold fast to our wife, it’s like having a strong axel at the center of our home–no matter how bumpy and rough the ride gets with the kids, the wheels will never come off. Even after the kids leave home, your love will roll on. 

Before Our Friends - You better believe your friends have a vital role. They can help keep you balanced, accountable, encouraged and even somewhat normal. But the most vital role a friend plays is to help keep you stay tight with your wife. Hang close with those friends who value most that they can never take the place of your wife–first place.

Chivalry says “babe, you’re in first place”. And wise men aim to make her feel it.